Jessica Simspson Weight Gain: The Story of the Decade

Jessica Simpson has gained weight.

Now that you have picked yourself up off the floor and recovered from this shock...whatever shall we do?

According to some of our super secret sources, Jessica Simpson is now almost classified as a " Big Woman". What the hell? Jessica may be a couple bulbs short of a tanning bed (Thank you Diablo Cody) , but she is an extremely attractive woman AND an extremely curvy woman. A few extra pounds won't hurt a bit.

Anyway, Jessica herself admits to the gain and says she is stress eater. Her sister Ashlee Simpson is none too happy with those who started this attack on her weight, and even Jessica's one-time trainer,Harley Pasternak agrees with us. He told Extra (source: Aceshowbiz) :

"She has curves where a woman needs to have curves. We all go a little bit up and a little bit down. But she's healthy. She's still sexy. She's still a beautiful woman. And I have no problem with the way she looks." He adds, "I think if more people looked the way she looks now, the country would be a lot healthier."

See?? Everyone who is anyone agrees with us.

Now..shaddup!

(By the way, Jessica also has extreme flatulence and she says "it smells like a bed of roses". Just sayin')